I wanted to cleanse my mind of yesterday’s multi-disc practice round at Rockburn, so I put the tourney bag back together and headed back to The Rock.
Ridge, Ibex, Trak and…the Lace. At #1 I promptly put the Lace into the crest. Then I hyzer it badly. Muttering ensues. I salvage the four with the Ibex. Crossing #6′s fairway to #3 I come across another player carrying an enormous Grip bag. We recognize each other. His name starts with a D….
D: Still carrying that NutSac?
Hawk: Both of them.
He remembers my name. He’s D…something.
#3′s basket…This is Disc:
I tee off on #5 with the Lace and I immediately think to myself, That could be good.
Deuce baby! This is the second closest I’ve ever gotten to #5. I threw a Roadrunner under the tray last year. I’ve thrown this drive a few hundred times over the years so this is noteworthy. Who leaves a full bottle of ‘gade behind?
Perhaps it was this guys playing partner:
I tee off on #7 with the Ibex and am pleased with the distance, but I hyzer to far left. Ahead I spy D stomping around the brush behind the basket. D explains that he flicked a Sidewinder down here and is convinced he nearly aced the basket. It’s his greatest drive ever on #7 to this basket. He can’t find it. He has searched deep. I head back up the fairway and he’s 30′ short of the basket against a tree. He’s bummed at his diminished greatness. We agree to play together. I ask his name. Donny! At this point I’m +4. Donny is +6ish. Donny promptly parks #8 and converts for the deuce:
Feel free to make your own Hunchback of Rockburn jokes. On #9 I Ibex down the hill and hyzer short of the creek. All I’ve got is a forehand. I flick the Lace and it looks promising until it ricochets off a tree on the other side of the creek and…
Apparently Macho Man Randy Savage is playing the course ahead of us:
I bomb the Lace down #11 and manage to waste the drive with a four. On #12 Donny unleashes an awesome flick that I call parked…
…for a deuce. I put the Lace against the side of the barn. I have to flick the Ridge towards the basket. Since there is no water around I pull it off for a three. On #13 Donny is deep behind the basket. It doesn’t look like it from the pic…
…but he put this in chain free for the deuce. While driving #14 Donny laughs when I point out that the group on #15 are really horrible, but is unbothered and parks it…
…for his third deuce in a row. He’s in such a zone at this point he putts out while checking his messages. I managed to execute my own deuce with the Trak:
On #17 I manage to swing the Trak wide enough on the turnover to avoid the guardian trees and convert this for another deuce:
At #18 I’m one back of Donny. I uncork the Lace and manage to avoid the trees and the Lace is last seen hyzering towards the basket. It’s a deuce:
Donny and I finish tied at 56. Neither of us suggest a play-off. You can see Donny in the USDGC later this year as Maryland’s representative.
I hadn’t been to Patapsco Doubles yet so I moseyed over there. It’s not as well attended as other leagues. Tonight there were eight brave souls:
I’m teamed with 15-year-old Matty whose rating is 30 points higher than mine. We’re going up against Waymon and Colin. Patapsco to the long baskets isn’t exactly rife with deuce opportunities so the photos are few. Even from the short tees which we played tonight. We started on #10…
Matty tees off:
Waymon tees off:
Colin tees off:
On #12 I bomb the Lace giving us a 40′er. Matty steps up and takes a run. As soon as it leaves his hand I put my arms up in the air indicating it is good. It hits right-side chains, but his KC Aviar tumbles out to that side. Colombo would call this a clue. On #14 Matty uncorks a roller that lands 5′ short of the old long basket. His putt for deuce…
…misses. I step up with the Ridge and hit it putting us 1 down. On this layout that could be a winning score.
Matty is quizzing me about my NutSac sponsorship because he’s a total dischead.
Matty: So what’s your rating?
Hawk: I’m not current but it’s about 927.
Matty: Don’t take this the wrong way, but how did you get sponsored if you’re not really good.
Hawk: I’m famous.
Then things go horribly wrong. On #17 Matty drives us to the A pin. We both execute ups giving us make-able putts. Matty is 12′ away. He steps up…and misses! I walk up thinking:
- How did he miss that?
- Wow this is really close!
I airputt it! We take a four and the wind is out of our sails. We briefly get one up on Waymon/Colin again on #1, but after hole #4 where my drive is OB in the road and Matty hits early and is short of the road, Waymon/Colin taillight us.
- On #5 Waymon hyzers a drive and just as I realize he is putting for a two he makes the 30′er and the camera is in the bag.
- On #7 Waymon makes an insane 50′ putt to match our four.
- On #8 Colin drives down the pipe and hyzers an approach in for a three.
I decided to drive up to Delaware today to scope out Iron Hill. I haven’t been there in a couple of years and if I am going to chase Advanced Masters title glory once again at the end of June I should reacquaint myself with the course. I tried to get Jorge to skip work but he couldn’t slick leave today so I was solo.
Back when I first started blogging for NutSac I wrote these long summaries (amusing as they were) that ended up looking like a grey wall like the front page of the old Wall Street Journal. One day Greg goes,
Have you thought about pictures?
Since the actual tourney is going to be non stop action to get four rounds done in one day I figure that I may not be able to snap that many pics so enjoy this Greg blog special!
I loved Dusk to Dawn! Remember Salma Hayek and the snake dance? Excuse me I’ll be right back. As I drive in, things come back to me. The dog run, the big playground. It’s actually pretty fancy. It’s got a ton of historical info:
I park and exit the Civic. Based on parking I may be the only one on the course at 1145. There is a guy with a metal detector doing his thing around the practice baskets. I desperately want a picture of him digging into the ground with his bowie knife but every time I am ready to surreptitiously snap his pic he looks up.
Near #1′s long tee there is a metal box the size of those utility boxes we used to play on as kids. It’s were the lost discs go:
My plan is two rounds. Short tees to short baskets, lunch, then long tees to long baskets. I decide to document each look from the tee. I figure this will be an effective psychological strategy over Jorge. He will be seeking his first ever sanctioned win while I’m going for #10. I can picture him now looking at these photos and breaking out into a cold sweat and then soiling himself.
Note the tiny tree leaning in from the left side 20′ off the box. Warming up before starting the round I put the Ibex in that twice. Hmmm…
I get my three on #1. I’m toting the original ‘Sac today with the Vibram 9:
Note the long basket in the background.
I put the Sole here…
…for a deuce.
The tee box is a swamp. I think the locals are teeing to the left. I do as well.
Okay you’ll start to see a trend going forward…
The guide arrows…
…prove very useful as my memory of the course is so so.
Another Sole drive for a deuce:
This was interesting. Note the boxed in tee. I didn’t snap a pic, but the thing is like a planter box. I think the locals are teeing off to the left of the box. That’s what I did.
This butterfly didn’t make it:
Or that way…
I wasted some time on this hole looking for the short basket. According to the long tee which has the hole sign/info on each hole (which I looked at after lunch!) there’s only one basket on #12.
No this isn’t a drive/deuce pic of 13′s basket, but I wanted to show the cool basket location:
Now this got confusing because up to this point the short baskets were grey and the long baskets were yellow. On #14 this was flip-flopped. I went to the short yellow.
Ibex drive results in a deuce:
Yet another interesting marker:
So interesting that when I got to #16′s short tee I forgot to take a pic!
I finish at 53. I felt pretty good about that. It must have been the red Vans:
- Peanut butter sandwich
- Chocolate chip Clif bar
- Chocolate chip cookies
Get mesmerized by the pretty colors…
While eating I get caught up with messages in my phone. I had texted both Jorge and Dick prior to the round to complain about the $13 in tolls I spent getting to Iron Hill.
Dick: You have to exit at 279 in MD and avoid the $5 in Delaware.
Jorge: Yep…if u get off on the last exit in MD u miss the DE toll.
Apparently everyone is in on this except me.
I never saw or heard anyone else on the course during my round. While eating a guy and girl arrive. The guy approaches me…
Do you know Tim X? I found his credit card on the course the other day.
I resist my first reaction which is to identify myself as Tim X. and not simply as a stranger in this town. The guy figures Tim X. has already cancelled his card. I suggest calling the bank on the back of the card. The guy thinks this is brilliant. My work here done I head back out to go long to long. I’m thinking under 80 is the goal.
This is disc…
My drive lands 1′ in front of the white tee. I am sensing that the short tee on #1 is not my friend.
I park the grey basket with the Obex. Unfortunately I’m playing to the yellow basket.
I unleash the Trak and clear the goalposts turning right…
…and land at the white tee. This time I remember to document this comedy moment.
NutSac: One with nature…
…you have been warned.
The tee sign said par 5. I am laying three with the Summit and make the putt:
I’m calling birdie! This spider was as big as the back of my hand:
Not a birdie but I made this putt with the Summit for a three:
I know, but when there are no deuce opportunities you have to relish in the made par putts!
You have been warned…
The “pro” tee posts:
A butterfly doing its thing…
Someone didn’t read the sign at the park entrance!
I made this long putt for the four…
Birdhouse of my soul…
You have been warned…
Where’s Jerman when you need him?
I am convinced he could stand inside this tree.The famous altar basket on #17:
I took a six and felt good about it.
I have no idea what the P is for…
…path, parking, pain? I’m laying three here after a Sole approach. I thought it was a cool pic:
And I made the putt:
It was Bring a Beer Buddy Doubles at the brewery. I confirmed with Dick at 10 a.m. that he was still a go for today. He says he’s in. He was one of the few. I roll out at noon thinking I’ll grab some lunch on the way. You never know about a mystery food truck. I end up making a run for the border and order some bean burritos…
…one of which turns out to be chicken. I arrive at the brewery…
The parking area is less than full. Turnout is looking light. I check in with Freight Train and Gregos:
Our host Matt is already sampling product and operating farm equipment:
I note the food truck is not present. I return to the Civic and text Dick this info. He calls me back:
Dick: I’m no amateur. Do you really think I would rely on a food truck for my lunch?
Dick: I’ve already hit Subway. I’m locked and loaded.
Being 40 minutes early I take my putters and warm up some. I’m actually making putts. During this time Freight Train, Matt and I discuss the ever-changing layout that is Creeping Creek. Matt isn’t sure where he wants to put the elevated basket. I suggest a spot. Matt agrees. Installation begins:
This is so disc! Like I said the putting was clicking…
Dick arrives. He’s less than thrilled with the weather and the turnout. Freight Train Wayne conducts our players meeting:
There are three teams of “pros”, three teams of “ams” and FT playing solo as a “pro”. Dick eyeballs the scoreport and FT is sending the three pro teams out as a six-some. The three am teams are also a six-some and FT is coming with us am’s. DIck and I engage in much eye rolling and attempt to persuade; and then conspire ourselves, out of this debacle to no avail. We start our herd of 7 (8 since Wayne gets two throws on each shot) on #12. Dick and I are playing as Maryland Nomads. Geremy and Tom (I’m shaky on the name thing here…you try keeping seven names straight!) are playing as Disc Golf F’ Ya! Billy and Steve are BFM. They are coy about what this stands for. So after each hole when scores are recorded we each take turns trying to guess what BFM stands for…
This isn’t a good sign…
Someone was having a good time:
You know it may not be your day #1…
We are standing on top of the hill getting ready to throw down to #15′s basket which is inside the treeline. There is a mando arrow forcing you left away from #16′s tee which comes back up the hill. I turn to Wayne…
Hawk: Is the mando in play?
Hawk: Why? There is no one down there. The only other card on the course is on hole 4 or something.
Wayne: Well we decided to play all mandos.
So I tee off with the Obex and it’s motoring down the hill and then veers a little to the right and zips past the mando on the wrong side. On the plus side it went deep into the treeline towards the basket.
Hawk: Whatever you do, don’t miss the mando.
Dick: No problem.
Dick tees off with his Groove which essentially follows the Obex’s flight path and smacks a tree to the right of the mando.
Hawk: No chance; you are sooooooo past it.
We mosey down the hill. Dick’s drive is 4′ past the mando line. I did manage to make a 50′er with the Ridge to save the circle four and staunch the bleeding.
Geremy runs a putt through the hop ropes on #17:
Followed by his partner Tom:
On #17 Dick drove his TL through the hop ropes and then converted this putt…
…for our first deuce of the day. BFM…Big Female Married?
You know it may not be your day #2…
So we’re standing on #1′s tee which is another downhill bomb. There’s OB to the left and OB 50′ behind the basket. I again take out the Obex and unleash it down the hill. I threw it about 75′ to the right of the basket and as it nears the green it gets fat and turns left towards the basket landing just inside the circle.
Hawk: We can make a 30′ putt right?
Dick: We’re 50-50 90% of the time from that distance.
I step up and bounce the Ridge off the front of the tray.
Dick steps up and airputts his JK Aviar to the right of the basket.
Pictures exist. You will never see them.
Tom’s deuce putt on #2:
BFM…Blowing For Money?
Freight Train Wayne also deuces #2:
BFM…Barry F”ing Manilow?
That Subway lunch Dick picked up on the way to the brewery lasted him nine holes, and the food truck has arrived, so he makes a pit stop before we tee off on #3:
Wayne has two long putts after his drive on #3. I turn to Dick and say,
He could flick this in.
Dick gives me the “you’re insane” look. Wayne whiffs the first one. The second one…
…is in for the deuce! BFM…Bacon Fried Macaroni?
A big drive on #4 results in this deuce putt by Tom:
BFM…By Forced Marriage?
Billy tees of on #5…
…formerly #3 for an easy deuce for his team.
BFM…Blue Flamingo Manure?
Everyone teeing off across the pond at #6:
…as the camera gets shaky on me.
BFM…Body Found Mutilated?
Dick also deuces for us:
BFM…Boats Floating Majestically?
Which hole would you like to play?
Wayne deuces #7…
…where we our joined by a young approximately four-year old boy who lives nearby and was speaking what we believe was French. He’s brandishing a piece of wood at each of us in as menacing a manner as a four-year old can muster.
Dick: That’s a hillbilly shiv!
On #8 I drive the Ibex 15′ to the right of the basket. I actually make the putt with the Ridge. I have no photos of this as at this point we’ve been trudging through an overcast mist for about three hours and our enthusiasm is waning.
BFM…Bad Flicks Made?
Wayne deuces #9:
BFM…Buying For Myself?
Dick finishes us off on a high note with another TL drive and this putt…
…for a deuce.
BFM…Big Failure Made?
We finished third in a three team race:
Disc Golf F’ Ya!: 48
Maryland Nomads 52
Three hours and 21 minutes to play 18 holes. We Nomad rolled out before the “pros” even finished.